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A teenage story

teenage "I have a rebellious attitude and every time my parents tell me I do, it makes me even more rebellious.”
When asked about a rule, most parents never explain the reason for it. “Because I said so, that is why!” Many times parents don’t even know why they have that rule. Their parents had that rule, and if it was good enough for them, it’s good enough for their kids.
Adolescence is a time for testing out independence and teenagers will do that by trying to push every limit and boundary a parent has set.They may experiment with different roles, behaviours, and ideologies as part of their process of developing an identity."Your teenagers are a wonder. Your son comprehends logarithms and trigonometry. Your daughter's reflexes on the soccer field are nothing short of amazing. He understands your computer better than you do, and she can explain the difference between socialism and communism. Both of them are intelligent, coordinated, and perceptive. What’s more, researchers have shown that teens consistently match their elders when it comes to risk assessment; your teens are just as capable as you of recognizing what constitutes danger."
"This isnt about making the faults of teenagers glossy, shiny and without consequence.
This isnt about condemning the way teenagers live.
This is a reflection of my years of being a teenager. The best and worst years of your life.
Music: timshel by mumford and sons and they own all the copyright." Streetlight Diaries - A teenage story(video)


Bullying and School Shootings

shooter1 Senseless killings

In recent years there has been increasing interest in juvenile criminals, specifically those who kill. Criminal behavior is learned in social environments (Sutherland, 1939). Physical abuse, sexual abuse, instability of caretaker situation and/or residency, absence of a father, parental alcohol or drug abuse, parental psychiatric history, parental criminal background, and violence in the home are eight prominent familial factors that researchers have attributed to the profile of juvenile killers (Heckle & Shumaker, 2001).  The students committed these shootings was because they had an unstable family relationship, leading to abnormal societal bonds.( Hirschi). Durkheim would suggest that these juveniles who commit school shootings feel a sense of normlessness in their society, and, therefore, act out in violence.
The original study focused on several factors, the prominent ones being rejection and ostracism.
Previous research has suggested that different factors influence different types of violence within schools. Some have blamed violence on the macro structure of the school, while others have placed blame on the more micro-level environment within the school.
Homicides can be divided into categories specifying the type of killing committed. One type, senseless homicides, can then be subcategorized into six groups—“thrill” killings, “hate” killings, “romantic” murder-suicides, “revenge” killings, “cult-related” killings, and killings that are carried out by mentally disturbed individuals (Ewing, 1990).
Senseless killings are “committed by relatively normal juveniles acting on impulse—often in conjunction with or under the influence of other juveniles” (Ewing, 1990, p 63). Most school shootings would be classified as a senseless killing under the subcategory of revenge since the juvenile shooters tend to seek retribution from those who have wronged them at school.Newman(Rampage: The Social Roots of School Shootings) explored ten different theories. They included mental illness, what they called “he just snapped,” family problems, bullying, peer support, changing communities, culture of violence, gun availability, violent media, and the copycat effect.

school shooting "Fantasies and dreams often stimulate productive human activity. They also drive the healthy psychological development of children and adolescents, making possible prospective, or “wishful,” thinking and creativity. So it is normal for an adolescent boy to escape into reveries about lovemaking with his girlfriend during an acutely boring class in school.Of course, dreams and daydreams sometimes have a dark and violent cast to them. Almost everyone has imagined vengeful scenarios, even murderous ones, after particularly frustrating experiences, according to research by psychologist David Buss of the University of Texas at Austin. Such fantasies can defuse tension and thus might be considered a type of psychological hygiene. As Austrian psychoanalyst Theodor Reik put it: “A thought murder a day keeps the psychiatrist away.”But what is cleansing to a healthy mind may overwhelm a less balanced psyche. Signs of psychic trouble include being excessively introverted and lacking strong social attachments. Violent offenders are also often pessimistic about their future and have low self-esteem; many have been harassed, bullied or rejected by classmates; suspended from school; or pressured by teachers.Adolescents who saw or otherwise experienced violence at a young age are very susceptible to intense brutal fantasies, points out clinical psychologist Al Carlisle, who practices in Price, Utah, and has long studied serial killers and young violent criminals. Such experiences, Carlisle says, foster a belief that violence is the only way to gain recognition and respect.An unbalanced adolescent often embellishes his daydreams with details of the venue and manner of the imagined massacre in some cases, amassing ideas from violent or violence-promoting movies, games and Web sites. Schools are a natural target because adolescents experience the worst slights in school. As fantasies become increasingly important to a disturbed youth, he begins to neglect his real relationships to focus on the mechanics of the deed he has dreamed about. Then a serious frustration, such as the breakup of one of his last friendships, may redouble his efforts to sketch out his killing.Access to weapons is yet a further cause for alarm, indicating that the youth has the means to turn fantasy into reality...."

"Deadly Dreams: What Motivates School Shootings? -By Frank J. Robertz
More here:http://www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=deadly-dreams&page=2

Growing up is difficult

being teenager Being a Teenager

By Tad Dunne, PhD

From Enneatypes: Method and Spirit

Growing up is so difficult.And the experiments are costly. You pay with emotional pain, anxiety, frustration, and humiliation. If you put on a weird self, others will laugh at you. But then if you put on a self that everyone wants you to be, something inside starts objecting. You don't feel sincere. You feel like a phony. Some teenagers genuinely like doing things that others don't understand like raising pigs or tap dancing. Then they have to hide that part of themselves just to look ordinary.
Why are teenagers so hard on each other? I remember when I was a teenager
One reason is that they are doing a bad job at figuring out for themselves how to be. Bullys push others around because, deep down, Bullys have done a bad job of finding out how to be. So, when they meet someone who is doing a better job with being different, they try to force them to conform to the Bully's rules or else they kick them out of the in-crowd.
Popular kids are no exception. They seem to have all the friends they want. But inside, they doubt that they are really worth something. In their heart of hearts, they know they work hard to be popular, and other kids buy the act. And a lot of it is just an act. The real test of how successful they are as teenagers is how they treat others. Some of those who always take center stage are downright mean to the stagehands  the less popular kids. They have figured out that one way to stay popular is to make sure that certain other kids stay unpopular.
What happens between now and then? Is there something to learn that you don't know about? Are teachers and other adults keeping some secret from you?

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