Depression- Our filtered reality

depressed man 1 Understanding Depression

At times, our worries and anxieties can overwhelm us. In addition, our worries can distort our perception of what is reality and what is not.
“Depression is primarily a disorder of perception.  We can live our whole lives without asking basic questions of ourselves, without beginning to perceive and challenge the constructs and fixed modes of thinking that make up our personalities. Depression, very quickly, destroys any illusion that your "personality” is something that lives in your head, a true reflection of "you".  It does this by taking away the "who" of you very quickly indeed.  Your personality is voided; removed. It seems like you have to start again from scratch. WhenI'm not in a down phase I can skip past negative thoughts as if they are barely there at all, but when I feel low they trip me up time and time again.  It is at these moments that the difference between my low and high states becomes most clear to me.  I cannot let the negative thoughts go.  I have no tools for doing so.  What is effortless for the up me is impossible for the down me and the gulf between the two personalities that exist within me seems immeasurably distant. One side cannot offer solace or help to the other because when one personality appears, the other is entirely subsumed.  My mind changes the world.” Fashionable Cynicism)

When overwhelmed with worry, a person may encounter a lot of scary thoughts coming at them all at once. Instead of getting upset, remember that these thoughts are exaggerated and are not based on reality.
“Our mind is our source of eternal power and we have a choice to use it positively or negatively. Our true salvation comes in the self- realization that we have the freedom of choice in how we think and no one else think for us.
Our personality and our character are modeled from the thoughts and feelings that we we experience within our mind and emotions more than they are defined by thoughts that we verbally express..” .( A soul approach to depression-Katy Oddenimo)
“When a depressive episode begins to recede it sometimes feels like my knowledge of reality, or the un-knowable, subjective  nature of reality, is becoming less real and more blurred. I feel that my brief insight into "the truth" such as it is, is being de-realized and that somehow I am retreating back into the forest.  In that forest lies the entirely illusory comfort blanket of my un-depressed mind.  This is perhaps the reason behind the great irony of how the leaden paralysis of depression can inspire great art and provoke radical thought( Fashionable Cynicism)
Depression influences our emotions, our thinking, and our behavior.  Depression may involve a flat emotional response to life.  Thinking often becomes repetitive, circular, pessimistic or fatalistic, and irrational.  Others can generally see the irrationality more easily than we can.  Sustained, focused action becomes increasingly difficult.  Suicidal ideas and plans may develop and even appear rational in the depressed state.  Depression can be deadly, though it generally is not.  Even a mild depression steals our vitality. who i am
Thinking about ourselves who we .are and how we are doing, is often irrational.  We are generally unable to recognize this irrationality; family and friends can often see it more easily than we can.  Depression is often associated with changes in sleep, eating, sexual interest, and activity level. Unresolved personal conflicts can exhaust us over time.  The conflict may involve a major life decision that we cannot find a way to resolve. Or the conflict may be difficult to even identify; the only clue is that we somehow feel stuck.  Both situations may be hard to understand because the conflict typically involves unconscious beliefs about our selves or the world as well as more conscious beliefs.  An understanding of our unconscious beliefs can begin by reflecting on our emotions, our dreams, our relationships, our art, and our patterns of irrational thinking and behaving. (Christine G. Glenn, Ph.D )
 “When our body and mind are paralyzed in their ability to think or change we becomes powerless to make rational physical decisions  and we feel helpless and hopeless about living.Depression is an insidious emotion that takes over our intellectual mind without our knowledge ,permission, or intention. It seems to slip up on us at our darkest moment of life and cuddle into our thoughts, nestiling itself into new home. In the beginning we remain totally unware of what is happening to us, until suddenly we realize that our life is not working for us in the way we would like for it to work. Even then we may not see ourself as depressed.”
“Our intellectual mind functions at a fraction of its ability when we shut down our emotions and feelings , wich blanks our distorts  the physical conversation and happenings that we experience. Nothing seems real in our conscioucness but pain and suffering that absorbs our intellect. The repetition of our daily structure and our learned discipline helps us toe the mark, getting out of bed , going to work, acting out our daily routine, no matter how miserable we feel on the inside.Our judgement can easily erupt into anger and violence as we begin to feel controlled and desperate.When we block our thoughts , feelings, and emotions we shut down the humanistic part of ourself and we return to our animal self that knows only that it needs to survive. In our early animalistic behavior we saw fighting as our survival tactic. ”
“As we begin to react to our depression we will frequently blame and judge other people as we see ourself in their reflections. At this point we will not have a clue that we are suffering from depression because we will be too busy blaming other people for what is happening to us. At this moment in our pain it is hard to remember that our life is about us and our feelings are about us. Our life is not about other people. When we believe that other people are causing our pain and suffering we are living an illusion.”
This transition of our soul involves the invisible mental and emotional change that occurring within our brain as we expand into the right side of our divided soul mind.
Our intellect knows of no other way to deal with reality except to judge our physical life relative to physical circumstances that it is familiar with.  Our ego is not up to accepting responsibility for what it has created in our life nor is it open to accepting the need to change. Because our ego is into separation it chooses to deny any awareness of our internal self,  wich obligates our intellect to totally deny any responsibility for what happens to us emotionally or physically. Family members, friends, and work are easy targets for our blame. “.( A soul approach to depression-Katy Oddenimo)
“When we go around comparing our inside feeling to other peoples outward appearance. What else can we do? We have no way of knowing what is happening in someone mind never sleeps s mind. I always tend to think other people are happier than they are, rationally I know they are not, and time and again people shock me with tiny revelations as to the real complexity of their inner, personal lives. But the myth persists. I have to keep telling myself not to judge my inside feelings against the illusory outsides of others.”
( Fashionable Cynicism  )
“Each drama of our life is designed by our mature soul in its attempt to capture our attention and get us to change our perception of self. When we choose not to look at our internal, invisible emotions and feelings we become depressed because we fail to see own power of creation. When we feel that we have lost control of our lives, we begin to see ourselves as unwilling victims of life’s circumstances and depression sets into our intellectual mind  like a jello  in a cold environment. Yet our mature soul mind must get our attention in some manner  because our intellectual soul mind depends on our changing our belief system. When we face any crisis, whether it comes from our internal sensory feelings or the emotional dramas of our external relationships, we are trying to motivate our intellect to look at life from a different point of view..But when we fail to recognize our challenge and we deny change, we plummet to the darkest corner of our intellectual mind in one of our “ is this all there is” depressions. Until we can accept and acknowledge ourself as a whole being of body, soul mind and emotions, and our spirit consciousness, we will continue to be depressed.( A soul approach to depression-Katy Oddenimo)




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